The Democrats are excited about a poll from Public Policy Polling, a Democratic polling firm, that shows Governor Scott Walker is behind in the poll to “a generic Democrat” by 5 points. At least one Democratic candidate for governor, Tony Evers, is sending out fundraising emails based on the poll results. However, Evers, as pale as he may be, is not a generic Democrat.

We thought we would help the Democrats by packaging one of them “generic Democrats” and making the candidate available to them. Generic Democrats are not sold in stores, although we’re betting the generic Democrat can be bought: